Mark 10:1-12 “The Way We Approach Relationships”

6–9 minutes

Mark 10:1-12 NIV

Suggested Praise Songs:

Resources for Family Worship (with Children):

Explanation:

Jesus left Capernaum and went to the region of Judea, then crossed over to the other side of the Jordan River (v.1). While he was teaching there, the Pharisees came to him once again, seeking an opportunity to trap him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” (v.2). At that time, society was male-centered, and divorce was primarily initiated by the husband dismissing his wife. Their question was intended to find grounds to accuse Jesus. Knowing their intentions, Jesus responded by asking them what the Law commanded (v.3). They answered, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away” (v.4).

This refers to Deuteronomy 24:1, which states, “If a man finds something indecent about his wife and no longer desires to live with her, he may write her a certificate of divorce, give it to her, and send her away from his house.” This law included the condition that the husband must have found “something indecent” in his wife. However, the Pharisees focused only on the clause that permitted a man to “write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” They interpreted this to mean that any divorce was justified as long as a certificate was issued. This was how people at the time misused the Law. Although they outwardly appeared to know and follow the Law, in reality, they distorted it for their own convenience.

Jesus first explains the reason why God gave the Law. The Law was given with the understanding of humanity’s “hardness of heart” (v.5), meaning it was established considering human sinfulness. Because people, due to their sinful nature, were unable to live up to God’s high standards, the Law was given with lowered standards as a form of accommodation. This is why the Law contains more “do not” commands than “do” commands—it limits how far people can go in following their sinful inclinations while establishing boundaries that should not be crossed. The law concerning divorce follows the same principle. Because human sinfulness could lead to unavoidable situations where divorce becomes necessary, God permitted divorce with the requirement of issuing a certificate of divorce as a minimal protection of human rights. This certificate allowed a divorced woman to remarry, preventing her from being left destitute and without options.Bottom of Form

Jesus then turns to Genesis 1:27 and Genesis 2:24 (vv. 6-8). God’s original intention for marriage was the eternal union of one man and one woman. This serves as an indirect response to the Pharisees’ question. Jesus emphasizes this by stating, “What God has joined together, let no one separate” (v.9). This highlights the divine sovereignty behind marriage—God’s providence is at work when a man and a woman come together in marriage. The Greek word translated as “joined together” literally means “to bear a yoke together.” Marriage, then, is about sharing a yoke, walking in step with each other, and living in unity. If discipleship—humbling oneself, emptying oneself, and serving—is actively practiced within a marriage, then the possibility of divorce becomes zero.

When Jesus entered a house, the disciples asked him to explain his teaching in more detail. In response, Jesus once again emphasized the permanence of marriage (vv. 11-12). Since marriage is something that God has joined together, even if a legal divorce takes place, the marriage remains valid in God’s eyes. Therefore, remarriage is considered equivalent to committing adultery.

Meditation:

As Jesus responded to the Pharisees’ question, he also taught about the new way of life for his disciples—those who are called to live out God’s kingdom on earth. At that time, many Jews interpreted the laws concerning divorce in ways that suited their own convenience, making divorce easy and commonplace. This was the way of the kingdom of the world. Their primary concern was satisfying their own selfish desires, and this became their standard for relationships. They would hold on to people when it benefited them and let go when it no longer served their interests. Even marriage, the most fundamental human relationship, became corrupted by this mindset. In a male-dominated society, wives were often treated like disposable commodities, easily cast aside at the whim of their husbands.

In his response, Jesus redirects their focus from the Law to God’s original creation design. This means that disciples should not be content with merely living according to the standards of the Law but should strive to live according to God’s creation plan. Since they have been born again as people of God’s kingdom through Jesus Christ, they can no longer use the Law as their ultimate standard. If one’s standard is the Law, the question will be, “What are the valid reasons for divorce?” But if one considers God’s creation design, the question shifts to, “What is the true meaning of marriage?” Those who sincerely trust in God and recognize His providence in bringing two people together will seek to live out the true meaning of marriage in their own lives.

We must remember that Jesus’ teachings on marriage, divorce, and remarriage were given with the assumption that both spouses are disciples. Additionally, his teaching was not meant to be a “new law.” If it were, then singleness, divorce, and remarriage would all be considered sins. However, Jesus himself was single, and the Apostle Paul also encouraged singleness as the best choice (1 Cor. 7:7). Paul even advised that if an unbelieving spouse wanted to leave the marriage because of their partner’s faith, the believer should let them go (1 Cor. 7:15). This shows that Paul did not interpret Jesus’ teaching on divorce as a rigid legal command.

Both Jesus and Paul focus on marriage, divorce, and remarriage. Regardless of one’s status—whether single, married, divorced, or remarried—the priority is to live a holy life in accordance with God’s will.

Prayer:

Lord, we thank you for placing people in our lives to love and live alongside. Help us to be content in our current circumstances. We trust that if it is your will, you will change our situation in your perfect timing. Above all, lead us to live holy lives in you and to practice discipleship with everyone we encounter. In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.

Discussion Questions for Children & Youth:

Key Point: God designed marriage to be a loving and lifelong commitment, but more importantly, He calls us to live holy and faithful lives in all relationships—whether we are single, married, or divorced. Rather than focusing on rules, Jesus teaches us to seek God’s plan and love others with humility and faithfulness.

  • For Preschool-Lower Elementary
    • What does it mean to keep a promise? How do you feel when someone keeps or breaks a promise to you?
    • Jesus teaches us to love others like God loves us. How can you show love and kindness to your family and friends?
  • For Upper Elementary-Middle School
    • Sometimes, people use rules to do what they want instead of thinking about God’s plan. Can you think of a time when following God’s way was harder than just following a rule?
    • God wants us to live holy lives no matter our situation. What is one way you can follow God’s plan in your relationships with friends or family this week?
  • For High School
    • Jesus shifts the focus from legalistic rules to God’s purpose for relationships. How can this perspective help us approach our friendships and family relationships today?
    • The Pharisees wanted to justify divorce instead of seeking the true meaning of marriage. How can we sometimes fall into the trap of looking for excuses instead of seeking God’s truth?

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